I'd love to start this romantically, perhaps with a "once upon a time", or something equally sweet and amiable, but I don't think that this deserves anything of the sort. This is not a fair entry, or a nice one, either. I'm not going to beat around the bush with allegory or pretty words, no comparisons, no metaphors or similes. No, I'm going to say what I've wanted to say for a very long time. I don't care if it lowers me to your level, honestly. I have an opinion and it deserves to be screamed out. And scream it out, I will. I think one of the greatest gifts you've ever given me, dearest pie, is the fact that I can be one hell of a raging bitch when I want to be. And oh, you have no idea how nasty I can get.
But perhaps today I might give you a little taste. Surprisingly enough, it'll taste a lot like the things you've so often told me. That's one thing I've always found very funny, you know. The fact that you can tell me things like, I'm selfish, I'm a terrible person, I'm going to end up with no friends in the world, and you're listing adjectives that describe yourself (yourself as in, not me, I hope that's clear enough for you) in perfect detail.
Now, usually, I'm a very nice person. Ask any of my friends (Oho! Would you look at that? I have friends!...unlike you.) and they'll tell you, I'm a sweetheart through and through. I take pride in the fact that even though I come from you, I'm actually human. I mean, wow, it's a modern miracle, isn't it? Who'd've thought. But I digress. Usually, I am a very nice person, as I mentioned before. But once you get beneath my skin, like you've done such an eloquent job of doing (and I know you gained that sick satisfaction with your narcissistic dictatorship--those are big words, by the way, you might need a dictionary) you'd best be off running in the opposite direction. I have no tolerance anymore for people who like to walk all over me. I inherited your beautiful ability to know where and how and exactly when to strike a person, knowing what to say and how to say it and when to apply it. Oh, I know how to do this very, very well. And guess what? Your weakness is now my greatest playground.
So how does it feel, sweetie-pie? How does it feel to have all your secrets blasted out at top volume? How does it feel to know that everyone knows what kind of a sick, twisted, hypocritical asshole you are?
I'd like to point out the fact, and this I find very amusing, that even though you are, what, forty-something? You act like a child. When someone expresses their briefest opinion of you, you attack them like a spoiled brat who can't stand to hear anything less than negative about themselves. You set yourself on a pedestal of perfection, but you don't see how ridiculous you make yourself. Oh, god, it's the funniest thing on the planet. You attack me by...wait for it...text messages! How cute. So...how old are you again?
Another thing I find funny is your lack of any sense of openmindedness. You are so adamant about seeing only what you care to see, and what's worse (and even more amusing) is that you seek to impress your opinions on others as though you were God. Ha. Haaahahaha.
"I'm older, I'm right." Now, honey, this is what we call the "real world". I know it's hard to believe, and trust me, I sympathize (I know it's difficult to realize what you truly are). You might be older than me, but it in no way makes you smarter. Or right, for that matter. In fact, your level of intelligence is rather low, I've realized. You think that by blaming someone smaller than you for your problems makes things right. But just because you say it doesn't mean it makes it absolutely infallible—I hope you realize this before the world slaps your face silly. If it hasn’t already, it should. You deserve a slap, you stupid bitch, for everything you do and everything you cause to happen.
Love,
Your sweet and caring daughter
