I was in love with you. No, I worshiped the grown you walked on, pretty much my entire youth. I think deep down you knew, behind your "I'm just a good christian boy" altitude. Every week, twice a week, I would get excited just to see your face and hear you play music in the church band. But, I was just this girl in the youth, your sister.
You missed out. You missed out on the best thing that could've happened for you. I admit, years later, and now, happily engaged, I'm still bitter. I find you on myspace, just to look at your pictures and get bitter, to look at her face. The girl who's obviously something I'm not, something that I couldn't live up to. I see her face, and get even angrier.
You told me Ryan, you told me you couldn't date because you weren't ready, but why is it, right after you told me that, you met this girl. I'm over you, I'm not still in love with you the way I was, when you'd flirt with me with your eyes, I'm over you, I'm just not over the fact that for four years, you lead me on, telling me that we'd date when you were ready, leading me on by telling me I was beautiful... then.. you signed my yearbook, Junior year, with "Love you thru Christ, SISTER"
I still remember when I met him, the actual one, the one who was really worth it, you then tried to come around, "do you want to get lunch maybe sometime".. no thanks jerk, I've actually got a real man to eat with now. how exciting would it have been anyways? What would we have talked about? Your Arrogant self, or maybe your Guitar, or maybe even how great of a christian you are, because I know you LOOVED hearing that.
Where are you going this summer? El Salvador?
Ryan, you suck. Why did I waste my time loving you?
