I'm scared you'll lose yourself again. I dont think I'll ever, ever get
married, but I have this sinking feeling in my stomach that you would have
an affair with whoever I married. I dont know why. Its irrational to think
you would do that to me. But now, I feel like no matter how much i love
you and trust you, you will always end up hurting me. You'll always do
something horribly painful to me because you can't control yourself.
You'll give in to any guy that looks at you with lust. And that scares me.
Don't do it. Just be the good person I know. I dont know what to do. It's
never ever going to happen because I wont be with anyone that seriously. I
can't tell you this, but I dont think I can ever get married or have a
real, seriously, sexual relationship again. So why do I worry so much
about you doing that to me? I just want to curl up and die.
