We should go on a date. My husband won't mind. OK, so he might a little upset - but if you pose for a picture with him, he'll be totally cool with it and then we can be on our way.
You are funny and not a publicity whore. This is attractive. I also am funny and not a publicity whore. Also, lets not forget that I have a hot bod. I read any interview with you that I come across and I giggle (I e-mail them to my husband and he giggles too.) I eagerly anticipate Kids in America. Perhaps you need a red carpet date? I'm available. If you're interested, I'll be here.
Sincerely,
HotButteredPopcorn
Ps. If you're not interested, please pass this letter onto Johnny Depp.. or Jake Gyllenhall...or you know, even Michael Cera (he's young for me, but I could probably teach him a thing or two.) Just cross out the parts about you and fill them in with equally flattering and witty things. I trust your abilities.
